A Tree Grows in Brooklyn

I just finished reading this month's read for my bookgroup, A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith. I really liked it. It reminded me of lots of old black and white movies I've seen about tenement living in New York City. I can't remember the names of any of them right now, but there's always the nice, Irish cop walking his beat, mean little boys creating mischief, and parents trying to make enough money to feed their children. If anyone can recommend a movie like that, please let me know the title.
All I can say is that I'm glad I have enough food to eat, because I'd find it extremely hard if not impossible to be
hopeful and cheery living in that kind of poverty.
Here's a paragraph that really stood out to me when I read it. It's a prayer by the teenage daughter. "Dear God," she prayed, "let me be something every minute of every hour of my life. Let me be gay; let me be sad. Let me be cold; let me be warm. Let me be hungry . . . have too much to eat. Let me be ragged or well dressed. Let me be sincere-be deceitful. Let me be truthful; let me be a liar. Let me be honorable and let me sin. Only let me be something every blessed minute. And when I sleep, let me dream all the time so that not one little piece of living is ever lost."
She was afraid of a life of drudgery and endless striving to get ahead; of becoming emotionally deadened to life.
Being a drama queen myself, this passage shouts out to me. I struggle with being obedient to God's Word by "living a quiet life" and "being content in all things" as the Apostle Paul learned to do. I want to pitch and rail, shout from the rooftops, fall down sobbing...I told you I was a drama queen. I don't do those things, anymore, but I want to.
I think I have a fear of complacency; of becoming an invisible old woman. What I need to do is be obedient to follow Scripture and God will be faithful to bring me along as He wills. Maybe I don't trust Him enough?